I've found that if you've lived in more than one place in your life, there's always someone you miss. When you leave a place that you love to go somewhere else, you feel your heart is split in several places at once. You don't know where home is because you don't know where your heart is.
Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody? You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy but at the same time you don't exactly know what's wrong either. There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand. If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. The people around you have stopped being comforting and being alone never was. When you're alone no one constantly asks you what's wrong and there isn't anyone who won't take "I don't know" for an answer. You feel the way you do just because. You hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until all you can do is wait.
This is for you, my best friend. The one person I can tell my soul to, who can relate to me like no other, who I can laugh with to no extent, who I can cry to when things are tough, who can help me with the problems of my life. I don't think you know what that means to me. I hope you know that even though we live across the state from each other, I'm always here to listen to you laugh and cry and help in all the ways I can. I hope you know I would not be the person I am today without you. I'm really excited for your college life, and for you and your boyfriend.
I know that we won't ever really be close again, and that hurts more than you know. All I can really ask for right now is for you to be a decent person. Maybe even a decent friend. I need something, anything. I don't want to lose you. All I have are memories right now. I wonder if you know how things have been so difficult without you.
I've learned that no matter how long it takes, things do get better. No matter how many tears fall there will always be a time when you stop crying and your eyes start shining again. Everything will be all right not matter what you, he or she thinks.
I like you, but I'm not sure if I know everything about you that I should know. I want to know exactly what makes you tick. I want to know your problems. I want to know what days you wake up on the wrong side of the bed. I want to know how many pillows you sleep with. I want to know if I'm ever needed, if I'll be good enough to keep you warm at night. I want to know everything about you. I want to know your past, your future, your in-betweens. Your favorite colors, your phobias. Everything.
When you love someone, it will always stay there. I have to believe that even though we go our separate ways, we still will be connected by this bond, forever. I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing, but I know it's a true thing. I know that no matter where you go or who it's with, we will always be connected. When we look up at the stars, when we know it was real, and it was why we're who we are.
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